Humour.

In search of Czech humour, the answer commonly surfacing is: black. But what shade of black? Can you compare it to, say, British or German senses of humour? You may be the judge of it. Here are some Czech jokes.

Little Joseph runs downstairs and tells his mother, "Mom, come quick! Dad has hanged himself in the attic." His mother runs upstairs only to find no one there. She is furious. "April fool," says Joseph, "He hanged himself in the basement."

God grants wishes to an American, a Frenchman, and a Czech.
The American says: "My neighbor has a beautiful house. I want an even better one."
The Frenchman says: "My neighbor has a beautiful wife. I want an even better one."
The Czech says: "My neighbor has a beautiful cow. Kill it."

What would happen if the heads of old people glowed like light bulbs?
Prague Castle would look like Las Vegas.

There are five policemen on a boat in the middle of a lake. It capsizes suddenly and all on-board drown. How many policemen are killed?
Ten. Five in the accident and five during the reconstruction.

Why are politicians like people's appendixes?
Their value is unclear, but they are harmful when irritated.

A girl comes home with her report card and shows it to her father. "All good grades, except you failed English," he says angrily, "What's the matter with you. Don't you know that half the world can speak English?"
Yes," she said, "but don't you think that's enough?!"

What was the name of the most beautiful island in the Red Sea?
West Berlin.

The doctor comes to the bed of someone in a very bad condition and says:
“I have good news and bad news for you!”
The patient says with a hoarse voice, at the point of death:
“Well, first gimme the good news.”
“According to laboratory tests, you’ve got one day to live!”
“Oh my God, what’s the bad news?”
“I forgot to tell you yesterday!”

 

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